Is it really unhealthy to talk about someone behind their back? If so, why? Many of my friends and even me take part in this kind of activity. I admit that sometimes I am talking to my closest friends about the person I am irritated with. After reading the book “The Power of New Attitude by Dr. Alan E. Nelson,” I found out the reason why “speck-picking” is one of the behaviors that I must avoid in order to achieve positive personal growth.What are the speck-picking behaviors?
• Expressing constructive suggestions for another person when he or she is not present
• Easily get irritated about petty behaviors or characteristics of another person
• Make negative remarks about another person as a “concern” or a “prayer request”
Why is it very important to completely eliminate these from our daily routines?
The answer is very simple but unconceivable in the eyes of people who only see the mistakes of others. In the book, Dr. Allan said that “our tendency to point out the weakness of others is a way to avoid facing our own short-comings and areas needing improvement.” This is so true and I couldn’t agree more!
Now, I understand that a part of me still needs improvement and this is a really serious matter. If I will continue my speck-picking behavior, I will be trapped in self-righteousness and that is something I am afraid of. I don’t want to be blinded by my own arrogance and ignorance. Thanks to the book of Dr. Allan for enlightening me and helping me to see where I need to work.
